Happiness, Should We All Strive to be Happy All the Time?
Ask anyone what they want in life, and amongst wealth and health, the word happiness will spring up. Once our basic needs are met, happiness is a universal goal for humans. We want to feel pleased, we want to smile and laugh, and we want to be stress-free. What causes happiness can mean different things to different people. Some people feel that contentedness with their body image equates to happiness, while others define it as spending time with loved ones. There’s no one ‘happiness recipe’ that suits everyone. As a planet, we are becoming increasingly obsessed with the need to be happy. But is it something we should really strive for? Let’s find out by looking at both sides of the argument.
Yes
In the ‘yes’ corner, there are people who argue that since we can universally agree that happiness feels good, we should all be striving towards it. Who wouldn’t want to feel happy all the time? It doesn’t matter if happiness to you is eating six meals a day or spending six hours exploring the outdoors – if it makes you feel good, do it. Your happy mood can have a positive impact on those around you, so you’d be boosting the mood of other people as well. Also on this hedonistic side of the story, people claim that positive thinking can have a huge impact on our wellbeing.
Not only do negative thoughts and emotions make us feel bad, but dwelling on them can make problems worse. This is not just an old wives’ tale. Researchers have explored the power of positive thinking and findings have linked it to lower stress levels, greater resistance to the common cold, and increased lifespan (The Mayo Clinic, 2017). This suggests that positive thinking and aiming to always be happy can be beneficial for our health and mental state of mind.
However, there are some people who would disagree that we should strive to be happy all the time.
No
On the opposite side of the fence, there are people who disregard the idea that you should strive to be happy all the time. After all, as humans, we react to our environment. If bad things are happening to us – as they do to everyone – it’s only normal that you should react to this by displaying negative emotions. To hide them would go against human nature.
People on this side of the argument think that having a range of emotions is part of life. Think back to the last time you were truly happy. Now, think back to the last time you were deeply sad. Consider how different these emotions are, and how you are able to explore a range of feelings. We’ve all heard about the yin and yang philosophy in life – the shadow can’t exist without the light. If you were happy all the time, you wouldn’t have anything to compare it to, and you would become so accustomed to it that you wouldn’t appreciate it. Not to mention, striving for happiness could isolate those people who are unable to achieve this goal, due to mental illness or external factors affecting their mood.
People against the strive would also argue that what makes us happy isn’t always the best thing for us, especially in the long term. For example, you might decide that true happiness is eating an entire vanilla cheesecake and washing it down with a bottle of rose every evening. While this can cause short-term happiness, long-term it can cause all kinds of problems.
Meeting in the Middle
There is a lot to be said for positive thinking. It can improve our physical and psychological state of mind, and it’s true that happiness is infectious. For some people, being a ray of sunshine in other’s lives is what brings them happiness, and if you’re able to be truly content all the time, that is fantastic. Others struggle to constantly be happy – we’re only human after all – and the pressure of always striving to be a positive person can cause further stress. As humans, we can get anxious if we are failing to meet society’s standards, and striving to be constantly happy feeds into that, which can be psychologically damaging.
I believe that while it’s important to do what makes you happy and aim to display a little positivity, you have to experience a range of emotions. If you’ve had a bad day, if you feel anxious, if life’s getting you down… that’s okay. Instead of striving to live in a constant state of happiness, try to accept that you will feel good and bad at different times, and know that when you’re feeling sad you will feel happy again. Doing exercise, spending time with those you love, and doing selfless things for other people all play a part in improving your mood.
Living a healthy lifestyle is a major factor in being happy, but this doesn’t mean you should starve yourself or live solely off foods you dislike in order to boost your mood. If you need help creating a healthy diet and lifestyle plan, or just a little boost in the right direction, I’m here to help. Click here to get in contact.
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